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THE DATAGOTCHI

$666.66

The only toy that lets you parent a tiny, emotionally unstable ETL pipeline in your pocket. This little pixelated terror needs constant schema updates, debugging snuggles, and the occasional backfill cuddle just to stay alive. It thrives on poor documentation, cries when versioning changes, and only truly smiles when you feed it a plate of spaghetti DAG.

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